Miserable Psalms

and other emotions I shouldn't entertain

Skylights Ignite

Iron and ocean. Salt and blood.
A perfume i can’t diffuse
i’ve written this same song several times
And the words always get reused
i guess my language lost its meaning
The letters fell away
All that’s left is a casket full of words
i never got to say.

This pen will bury it.

You’ve served as confirmation
That when you pass away
It’s not the vessel left to rot
But loved ones who decay
Like the raining down sand 
Of a broken hourglass
We’re all drowning in our futures
That may never come to pass
So we sing:

They gave you a headstone
But chiseled your exit in my chest
Another skylight ignites
Another friend laid to rest

With a new moon in bloom
We’ll fall from the sky
Let the sandbar be our burial ground
Before the heavens beneath us die


i am deeply sorry i could not be there on the day when they put you into the ground for good.

Follow Me Home

If you’ve been painting a picture
With the lights outside your window
But the oils still run
And time moves all but slow
If you’ve been aching for an exodus
That final burden’s escape
Then shut those cutting blinds
And untie the drapes

O, follow me home
O, follow me home

Taking steps between the days
Penning letters to those that died
Time and again, fold up your works
Accept your fate in stride
We all possess fear
Of what lies out of sight
Just don’t forget that there’s
A tunnel at the end of the light

O, follow me home
O, follow me home

Dear light outside
Share this song with me

Say hello on the brighter side

Stained Glass

Sinewed heartstrings
Gripping firm on the handle
Of an axe that longs to swallow 
What surrounds this vacant panel
Can you feel the pane of broken glass
Can you see through the years
Of age and weather and cast away stones
that pierce your darkest fears

And you say it’s not ok
Life sweeps you up and you can’t stay
Once all your friends are gone
Are you supposed to stay away

In the morning light
Feeling overshadows reason
Eclipsing my state of mind
The sun split in two
By the window frame
All we love we leave behind

So i peer out this aching structure
Perched atop my clay throne
With the smoke from my breaths
Exits everything i’ve known
There has to be a method
A way to fracture wounds
When you’re breaking the broken
Will the shards fall back in tune?

And you say it’s not ok
Life sweeps you up and you can’t stay
Once all your friends are gone
Are you supposed to stay away

In the blinding light
Feeling overshadows reason
Eclipsing my state of mind
Setting sun won’t return
The heavens bathed in flame
All we love we leave behind

i want to see the window shatter
i want that peace of mind

Clutching Chords

If you’ve felt a blood rush cleanse
Tell me how heartbreak mends
Cause the hinges on my window
Are rusted thrust open again
Each day is the same
These chords are all i have to claim
For i set fire to the house
And threw my diary’s pages in the flame

i’m clutching these chords
Hoping they reach you
Is your love measured by measures
Is it over when the song is through

Blood pulses to a different beat
i’m haunted with proof
But in staring at this sooted wreckage
And the antiques of my youth

i still play for you

i’m clutching these chords
Hoping they reach you
Is your love measured by measures
Is it over when the song is through

This place was a mentor
It’s turned into gold
You’ve turned into gold

Monuments and Memories

Revealing what i’ve come to expect
The sunlight cutting through these branching trees
It’s just that warm palette skyline balancing
Upon man’s black geometry
i wanna lie in the depths of this city
Like it lies in the depths of me
i want to shower in the gravel
Of its monuments and memories.

Show me where this city sleeps
So i can lay down
Show me where this city sleeps
So i may rest sound

It’s the love/hate/love
In this affected heart
These streets keep my blood coursing
But the median tears my veins apart

A score to wipe away
20 years winding down
This city has a firm grip
But i’m getting out, leaving town

Show me where this city sleeps
So i can lay myself to rest.

Taking one glance before i hide my face
Rid myself of all i know
Five flags of surrender surround
Thickening fog of an off-white glow
Walking down Palafox towards the Quarter
Those friendly store fronts i abuse
Every step, a temptation to skip the curb
Born and raised and fed cobblestone curfews
This town is a maelstrom of retired ambitions
Laid my parting words on those graffitied tracks
All the founding fathers have turned to stone
i’ll do the very same as i look back.

i’m in love.

Bury Your Head

We all share the same stories
Listen to the same narrative
Our backs are to the same binding
Common existence is relative
In a moment’s notice
Your life will be through
Please take every step as it comes
As it comes around to you

Such a shoreline perspective
No idea what we’re moving toward
We all answer to the same thing in the end
Keep it moving forward

We’re living solemnly as synonyms
Patiently waiting for ye olde redeemer
Wake up wake up wake up
This is the real world, dreamer

Please be the antonym
Please be the fox

Such a shoreline perspective
No idea what we’re moving toward
We all answer to the same thing in the end
Keep it moving forward

Even the sand is made of seashells
Our promised future is gone and dead
Swallow your last breath
Make a move or bury your head

It’s been leading up to this forecast
The crackle of lungs flash
Radio static
Radio static

i’ve been reading a book called the condition of man

And it’s lacking a certain intrigue
For the pages don’t turn like they should
And the words do not flow seamless

i suppose therein is the basic flaw:

There’s no reason in strife

There’s no need for a greater understanding
There’s no purpose for self validation
There’s nothing but you and me
And thoughtless generations
that withstand the test of time

So let’s erase our life’s works

Endings are better than lazy chapters
Just as our souls through time careen
Like waves crashing across
The cardiac monitor machine

Paralyzing Progress

i heard my footsteps
Singing off the sand this morning
Where the sea meets the sky
Where the waves surround, all untouched
Searching for the place where the sky finds its light

—————————————————————-

(It’s too late to find holes in the ocean)

Waves break not far off the coast
The sea thirsts for my neck
It feels as though the tide has interviewed my soul
And knows I’m a total wreck.
i sink my head deep in the sand
My last emotion expired
i can hear the tinkling granules whisper my fate
Like transmission through a distended wire

Heavy hand stretched to atmosphere
Use my eyes to outline the sky
But it’s only a matter of time
The truth will bind us in a sigh

And this stretch of sand shifts to white noise
Restless, left to static while the ocean sleeps
So if death is the answer to calculations composed
Then i’m wading waste deep

And the transmission cuts in to say

(Beware your own preemptive strike)

Ride life to its peak
Sell the stock
Pull the plug
(Take a step back)
Jump off

Heavy hand stretched to atmosphere
Use my eyes to outline the sky
But it’s only a matter of time
The truth will bind us in a sigh

Perhaps i’m betraying myself
But i’ve never felt
Such a sense of truth
Such a sense of truth 

All Engulfing Kerosene Sleep

There’s an old lighthouse on the jetties
Guiding fire led astray
i turn my head once more
As aching corneas give way
And i’ve tried to peer into its light
Least a hundred times before
But I’m always told i’m a broken man
All beaten up and sore

Rain descends
Containers fill
i pick apart dreams
And pray to God
It’s more than just a ritual

This all engulfing kerosene sleep
Has affected me again
For its flickering tongue of light
Caught you like methane

Ignorance is bliss
Blindness is perfection
But pondering left me worn thin
At this rocky outcrop’s reflection
And as my blood breaks the skin
i succumb to sheer elation
For i’ll leave this world knowing that
i am my own creation

This all engulfing kerosene sleep
Has affected me again
For its flickering tongue of light
Caught you like methane

O, disciple of frailty
Following, failing, refusing to sway
Birds of a feather
We’re all headed the same way

This all engulfing kerosene sleep
Has affected me again
For its flickering tongue of light
Caught you like methane

——————————————————

i’m not a godsend
Or a perfect entity
Though often times I feel 
i’m an enlightened soul
i’ve felt those moments of brilliance
i’ve been touched by the Lord
And i’ve found it was will
Hanging on our every word
Religion is a tool of purpose
Karma is a means of explanation
Neither are entirely false
Just a different truth or orientation

A single realization to control the world around us
With that single realization, we’ll control the world around us

Mangrove Veins

i’d like to thank my elders
For riding currents they couldn’t break
Their waves never moved the shore
But i’ve been left in their wake
And i’ve been crawling amongst the tree roots
Searching for a stronger tether
On the seams of these family ties
But they’ve been left to sever

Because they baptize kids in mortar
And pour concrete on the roots
Of this family tree that can’t withstand
Another limb to lose

My bloodline is a mangrove
Buried in the sea and in the sky
Salt creeps on the roots
They’re all cured and dry
My bloodline is a mangrove
And as hard as it may try
i will never wither
i will never die

Because they baptize kids in mortar
And pour concrete on the roots
Of this family tree that can’t withstand
Another limb to lose

So draw lines in the sand 
With both bare hands
Use them as a means to climb
But like the saturated mud
Concentrated in your blood
They’ll be washed away in time

Wave After Wave

In time we’ll all face it
If shown the light of day
Slowly creeping ever reaching
Essence left to fray
Like a gust blowing through the marram
Bending close to break
Enveloping us entirely
Existence left at stake.

Wave after wave
i’m hand in hand with the best of me
Crash after cap
There’s a shadow cast at my side

And there are meetings with this shadow
Where i take the best of me
Wrap it up in tiny satchels
And i throw away the key

Wave after wave
i’ve lost touch with the best of me
Crash after cap
The sun streaks for the horizon line

But i have my love my life and family
And the caring and kindness that gnaw
i’ll cast them out in the rain bundled with my frozen heart
And pray dear pray they thaw

And i share all this with you my dear
So you may one day see
It’s not my darkness you could not love
But what i strive to be